Archive for September, 2009

Great Freedom Binging. “Yes We Can!”
September 30, 2009

Great freedom binging

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September 30, 2009

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Richard Acting Up At Mooji’s Xmas Party 2008
September 29, 2009

Learn about Nonduality:

NeverNotHere

Mooji

Mooji on NeverNotHere
September 28, 2009

Life without a Lobster
September 28, 2009

Cap’n Sailor Bob and Jeff are fishing in open sea.

The weather is terrible and the boat is rocking violently back and forth.
The situation is overwhelming the two fishermen.

Cap’n Sailor Bob: “Don’t know if we’re gonna catch some…”

Suddenly jeff loses his nondual balance (there’s no-one having a balance remember?)
and falls overboard down to water.

Jeff: “HELP MEeee, I’VE GOT A PAIN BETWEEN THE LEGS!!!!”

Cap’n Sailor Bob: “AIN’T NO TIME TO JOKE AROUN’ WITH YOUR WILLYWONKA, You’re DROWNING !!!
HERE’S THE SAFETY BUOY, GRAB IT FOR MAHARAJ’S SAKE”

And that’s what happened! The safety buoy saved Jeff and this night they both went back ashore…
Well, three of them maybe!

Jeff has struggled to remove a record 37,4 pounds Homarus Americanus from his Qigong balls.

The lobster mostly a night hunter must have taken them for jellyfish.

‘talk about Absolute Intimacy with What Is?

FREEDOM is definitely a “life without a lobster”.

At the shopping mall with Eckhart Trolley
September 26, 2009

Eckhart Company unexpectedly went bankrupt and now Eckhart is back in the streets.

Near the shopping carts.

Eckhart: “Spare some change?”

Layman: “I’m all out, maybe another time Dude!”

Eckhart:
I’m no DUDE! I’m da HEeeRE AND NOooW OVERLORD!!!

(dreadful German accent)

Layman: “Mphh, you mean you’re overloaded uh? How many booze did you have?”

Eckhart: “Forget it Muggle!

Only the new species know what I’m sayin’!”

The teaching
September 25, 2009

Grand Master Obi Wan Kiloby:

“To find the force you have to embrace both the dark and the bright side…
Only then will you find the source of all power.”

Luke SkypeTalker:

“Come on gimme a break, where’s the catch?”

At the Drive-Thru
September 25, 2009

In the future.
Somewhere in the States.
The human race DID IT!
NO teachers, No seekers anymore…just unity.

Opened window, in the car, at the McDual Drive:

Me: “I’ll have a Crispy Ramana, a Chicken McKiloby and my friend will just have some Osho nuggets please.

The Other Me: “We don’t do the Osho nuggets anymore!

Me: Why?

The Other Me: I don’t know, it’s just happening !

Me: OK! My friend said that he will accept the present moment and that he will go instead for a Siddhartha Sundae.

The Other Me: Allright, any fries?

Me: nope! …

The Other Me:  …

Me : …

The Fly passing by: BzZzz

Simultaneously: Aaaaaah  THE NOW !!!! (sigh of satisfaction)

The Other Me: Okidoki my friend, I luv’you so much, Take care!

Me: I luv’you too, Take good care of ME please.

My Master drug dealer
September 25, 2009

My Master drug dealer said to me: “I’m off stock MAN, I can’t help”!

I said: “C’mon, I need to jack up! You must have some Advaita leftovers lurkin’ somewhere, right?”

My Master drug dealer said to me: “I told you, Advaita stock is gone! Come back next week I’ll get you some
good pills, it’s called “NonDual Amphetamine” !

I said: “allright I’m in, but as for now haven’t you got a BLU-Ray or two of good old school Satsang?”

My Master drug dealer said to me: “C’mon BRO’ BLU-Ray is bygone, you’re still identified with
the world of form aren’t ya?

I said: “Not even a DVD left somewhere?”

MY Master drug dealer said to me: “OK OK! Take this one and now GET THE HELL OUT!

I said: “Oh my god ! another ganJaGI flick! that’s good dope! you’re the PIMP!”

Cut the Crap
September 25, 2009

Coming from nowhere you appear one day on YOUTUBE and we hear you saying “it’s just this, we’re all one!”… lol

I wanna say: “cut the CRAP MAN, you’ve got to be clearer !
You’re speaking on YOUTUBE here! This is not the Speaker’s Corner at the Marble Arch corner of London’s Hyde Park.

You’re wearing trippy clothing, sleazy artefacts and wherever you’re giving a speech
everyone sits at your feet or if it’s not the case there is always one pot of flower or something else
that might maintain a “satsang” mood.

I wanna say:  “cut the CRAP MAN, don’t put on “spiritual” airs.
Can’t you just wear a shirt like Scott Kiloby or Tony Parsons?
Whether they are the real deal or not, don’t have a single clue! But at least,
these men are trying to stay mainstream.

You recite the “upanishad” and we can hear in your voice inflection
that you rejoice in repeating that’s “sacred scripture”!

I wanna say:  “cut the CRAP MAN, Your scriptures might be sacred and make sense for Indian people,
but in western context it becomes “spiritual snobbery”!
if you’re the real deal start using stories we can all get the hang of!

You’re quoting Jesus words all the time and this gives you backup and credibility!
Even by considering the historical context, are Jesus words really effective? Damn! His words are metaphorical,
that’s harsher to decode than a Mastermind game.
His divine teaching has been around for thousands of years and seekers are still searching!

I wanna say:  “cut the CRAP MAN, don’t put on “spiritual” airs
and find a 21st century way to express yourself if you’re the real deal and aren’t actually playing bogus guru !

You say: “look at the flower in complete stillness without attaching any labels”
and you say that with a soft and almost hypnotic voice.

I wanna say:  “cut the CRAP MAN, don’t put on “spiritual” airs
and find a layman way to express yourself if you’re the real deal and aren’t actually playing bogus guru !

Like an Armageddon prophet you say that if the human condition doesn’t change, you’re skeptical about us
subsisting more than 100 years.

I wanna say:  “cut the ENDLESS CRAP DUDE! I really need to end this poem!

Like business wizards are you trying to raise the sense of “urgency” within us,
hoping we’ll rush to get your next book for the sake of the planet?
Yes you’ve got a point on this because the threat of nuclear war or climate change are subjects in which we
need a wake up call but REALLY PAL, by telling people “we’re all one” “there is no person here” or even more
irritating “it’s this! it’s just happening” blah blah blah….

Really, with all these egos running around you’ve got a HELL OF A JOB so you’d better start thinking over
your teaching if you truly wanna have a chance!